{"id":1501,"date":"2010-03-09T11:33:26","date_gmt":"2010-03-09T19:33:26","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/?p=1501"},"modified":"2010-03-09T11:38:02","modified_gmt":"2010-03-09T19:38:02","slug":"i-feel-violated","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/?p=1501","title":{"rendered":"I feel violated"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I love looking at Google Analytics to see what search terms people type in to land on my site. The keywords are usually pretty obvious (&#8220;emily morganti blog&#8221; for example), or have something to do with dollhouses (&#8220;<a href=\"\/dollhouse\/tomy\/tomy.html\" target=\"new\">tomy dollhouse<\/a>&#8221; and &#8220;<a href=\"\/dollhouse\/xmasbox\/roombox.html\" target=\"new\">christmas roombox<\/a>&#8221; crop up a lot). Back when I was complaining about my crappy experience with a <a href=\"\/blog\/?p=138\" target=\"new\">Chase late fee<\/a>, I got a lot of visits from people trying to hunt down Kelly Hanick, Chase&#8217;s customer service guy. Et cetera.<\/p>\n<p>Okay, those all make sense. Even searches like &#8220;<a href=\"\/blog\/?tag=michaels-puzzle-house\" target=\"new\">a puzzle that puts a house together<\/a>&#8221; and &#8220;<a href=\"\/blog\/?p=1487\" target=\"new\">adopt a pet like emely<\/a>&#8221; make sense, in a wonky internet kind of way. But what happened today does not make sense, because today someone found this site by searching for &#8220;daddy sniffed my panties.&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>*shudder*<\/p>\n<p>Of course, upon seeing this, the first thing I did was type that phrase into Google to see what happened. The search returned so many pages of porn I couldn&#8217;t even find my website among them until I restricted the search to this site only. As it turns out, Google thinks that a short story I wrote, <a href=\"\/writing\/samples\/storyofo.html\" target=\"new\">Story of O<\/a>, is a decent match for that phrase. Not because it contains the exact phrase (which it doesn&#8217;t), but because it contains, at various points in the text, the words &#8220;daddy&#8221; and &#8220;my&#8221; and &#8220;pants.&#8221; <\/p>\n<p>So I guess I should apologize to whoever it was who waded through all those pages of porn to land on my short story&mdash;which in spite of having the same title as an erotic novel and being a tad racy, is not porn, and depicts neither daddies nor panty sniffing.<\/p>\n<p>(I can&#8217;t wait to see what happens to my search traffic after I post this blog entry&#8230;)<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I love looking at Google Analytics to see what search terms people type in to land on my site. The keywords are usually pretty obvious (&#8220;emily morganti blog&#8221; for example), or have something to do with dollhouses (&#8220;tomy dollhouse&#8221; and &#8220;christmas roombox&#8221; crop up a lot). Back when I was complaining about my crappy experience [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[17],"class_list":["post-1501","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-thoughts","tag-around-the-web","post-preview"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1501","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=1501"}],"version-history":[{"count":18,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1501\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1520,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1501\/revisions\/1520"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=1501"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=1501"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.emilymorganti.com\/blog\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=1501"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}